Days Without Him

It has been one month since he left~
I miss him so much~
Never had I experience this kind of feelings, the feelings of putting everything behind and fly with him~

It was not easy, from the day we got together until he flies, we have never been apart from each other~

This may not be the most difficult long distant relationship compare to those whereby the time difference is 10-12 hours, 5 hours difference is not that bad yet.

But to me, the one who take so good care of me, worry every single thing for me while I don't really have to care so much thing, without him make a huge difference in my life.

From that point, I realize I love him much more than I think.

I miss him a lot!!

I get to taste how those couples cope with the distant and timezone~
Seriously, not not not easy~

I have to work when he done with his job, I am still sleeping while he is getting ready to start another day~
When I have my breakfast, he is eating lunch~

It is like he is so much ahead of me.

We video call whenever we have time, text whenever we can. That is the only way we can stay in touch, and screenshots of video call has become our couple selfies^^

Before he left, he cleaned the room for me knowing I wont do it anytime soon.
He left notes here and there to remind me what to do and secretly wrote a few pages of my notebook, telling me to take care and everything~

Please tell me how not to love this guy~

He always make me cry but he also cheer me up a lot~

To those out there who is dealing with long distant relationship, stay strong and have faith!!

I always tell him, "We must be strong enough to overcome distance and time~"

He tells me"If you are willing, I am willing to do so."

Have faith, have trust, and continue to love each other to those long distant relationship couples~

A RANTING Post

This is a fucking ranting post and I'm gonna RANT just a bout anything that happened to me recently. How my UNI life ended in a pathetic way.

Words are lethal.

Apparently most people doesn't know about this.

If YOU guys were so curious about me and him, just FUCKING come and ask us. If you so FUCKING concerned about us, you will come and ask people who involved instead of people around the involved ones.

I know what you guys were talking behind my back.

BUT, what does my relationship have a fuck to do with you?

WHO ARE YOU to judge my relationship?

YOU GUYS DISLIKE me and him in a relationship because of your empty brain thinking that, "Why did she approach the guy knowing he already has a girlfriend and why did he approach the girl knowing he already has a girlfriend?"

EXCUSE ME.. EHEM~

HOW much do you know what happened between him and his girlfriend?

How much do you know what happened between us?

WHO are you to judge my relationship?

Who are you to judge me?

Seriously, grow up and get a life!

You guys, made a conclusion based on what you saw in classes. A short 3 hours or less lecture or 1 and half hour tutorial class and you all can come out with a conclusion. Come, I clap for you.

A relationship between two people, how much do outsiders see and what do outsiders know when they are not the one in the situation?

If this world is only made of black and white, then this world would be much simpler. I'm SORRY, too bad this world isn't just black and white.

The one who felt sorry for his ex girl friend, because he was the one who brought him into the gang. He was angry at us because of this. ELLO, make it clear please. You should be angry at yourself for bringing him into the gang and causes his ex girl friend to lose a boy friend. And not angry at us. IF, you really felt that all these happen because of you. It will be if it meant to be. you couldn't accept us? We don't need your acceptance. 

If I am you guys, I wouldn't even care how my friend got into a relationship with this guy who already had a girl or boy friend. As I said, how much do we, outsiders really know what happened ? If my friend decided to get into the relationship, despite the risk and pressure of being called as a bitch, I won't boycott my friend. WHY?? Because, IT IS A PERSONAL CHOICE!! The most I do is, ask why, how, what happened etc etc.. THAT'S IT!! It's very personal choice, they have the right to do what they want, choose who they want to be with etc etc..

Why would his or her personal choice had anything to do with our FRIENDSHIP?? I JUST DON'T GET IT!!

And so, the WHOLE GANG, boycotted me and him.

I left the UNI , without friends.. Because, I had a new boyfriend who once had a girlfriend.

I appreciate one of the other friends who said, "When two people are together, the most important is to be happy. Why care what others talk about?"

And he kept on telling me when i'm crying, that, we can't control how people think about us or talk about us. Just let them be. 

Broaden your mind, stop hiding in your tempurung and stop looking only the shallow surface of everything..

Well that is what I wanna say to you guys,if you guys ever coincidentally saw this post.

BYE~

[REVIEW] Etude House Face Conditiong Cream

HIHI!!
Just bought this new baby from Etude House recently after seeing lotsa good reviews about this Face Conditioning Cream...
This is just to share my opinion on this product, I bought this on my own and Good Things should be shared, right??

At first when I heard the name, my first impression and expectation for this cream is that it's gonna make my face silky soft and beautify my base makeup.. Just like how hair conditioner make your hair become silky smooth..And yeap, as it's name suggest, it does make your skin smoother and softer!!! WOOHOO!!

TADAA!!

It claims to..

Photo not mine..***

First, the PACKAGING!!

1) Not as princessy as usual, but still decent.
2) Travel friendly and hygienic
*I always travel back and forth my hometown and university, lightweight and travel friendly is a bonus!!
3) 75g/2.64 oz. that's a lot of product!!

PRICE..
RM79.90 for 75g / 2.64 oz. of EH product...
EH, seriosuly??!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? No regret for buying this!!

The product description...
-SPF25/PA++
-Whitening + Anti-wrinkle + Balancing

Color, Texture & Fragrance
-White and appear to be thick, but very easy to blend actually
-It has nice and subtle flora-like scent and I like it!! (somehow I like to sniff my products)

fully blended..see how it brightened and give my skin healthy glow??
sorry for my hideous hand..

What I like about it??
-It serve as a good primer or makeup base..
-It brighten up my skin and give healthy glow + even out my skin tone and redness (I have a sensitive nose which get red very easily making me like the red-nosed reindeer, Rudolph. Geez''')
-Cover up tiny pores quite well,
-It really does what it claims to do.
-This product provide a veil for your next makeup product to adhere on which allow the makeup to last longer and it.
-Lightweight and not sticky, absorb quickly
-Skin visible look smoother
-Moisturizing (I have dry skin due to not enough moisturization, therefore I always look for products that moisturizes so my skin won't secrete excessive sebum)
-Certainly worth to buy, inexpensive for such amount of  good product!!

Note: Don't be too greedy and use so much product, it will become clumpy and flaky when you apply foundation..

I don't really have anything dissatisfied with this product..
Overall, I really like this product from EH... This is certainly a good primer to go with plus you canget it with reasonable price...
Highly recommended~

I Wish~

I hope one day, when I see you again..
I will be able to smile to you..
And greet you casually..

Because this means I had completely let go of you..

You didn't know the pain I endured behind your back,
tears that had dried up without you noticing,
those small little wishes that shattered by you,
crashed tiny little hopes to see you love me like you used to be,
YOU KNEW NOTHING..

But I sincerely hope that the next time I see you again,

I won't feel heartache anymore,
no more tears streaming from my eyes,
no more wished or hope or expectations on you,
ANYMORE..

Say ADIOS to our memories which almost had nothing..

I would love to enjoy watching stars again without reminding me the pain you brought.
I would love to enjoy the starry sky once again..

Lastly, I would love to stop giving a FUCK about you..

I miss u..

I very miss u..
I miss u a lot..
I miss u so much..

If that night you didn't come and tell me that kinda stuff,I may feel much better..

I really miss u a lot..
I feel like want to call u..
I wanted to pm u..
I wanted to wechat u..

I restrained myself..
I know I have to move on..
I know I have to get over u..

But now, I really miss u...
I don't know u will reply me or not..
I don't u will answer my call or not..

But..

Even if u do answer my call,
Even if u do reply..
Thing won't change either..

一路走来的我。。

从小到大，那些auntie uncle 都会称赞我美，说我妈妈生的女儿都很美。。
心里是暗爽啦。。但是大了都知这是客气话。。

没有什么特别。。只是想分享照片，这么样从丑丙的我，变成现在的我。。

从 form 5, 17 岁。。
到 lower 6, 18 岁。。
到 Upper 6，19岁。。
然后大学 Year 1，20岁。。
Year2，21岁。。
Year3 ，22岁。。

一路走来，
虽然，不是经过了大风大雨。。
但是也尝试了人生小部分的甜酸苦辣。。

不多不少，也又被一些经历改变了。。
人是该进步的。。
人是会变的。。
变得更好或坏，就看自己了。。
不管是人格，或是外表，人，外在内在也要有。。
因为人，偏偏就是看外表先，后看内在。。
人，是
靠第一印象来判一个人的人格。。

可能有人看我像小混混，援交妹，没前途，读书不成的人。。

但，我是个大学生。。读着心理学。。
不要看我外表来做判断哦。。

嘻嘻。。

其实，
只是纯粹看到朋友post她的照片，从她form5 到大学Year3 ，变得越来越美。。

我是呀，我说呀，有心什么都不是不可能的。。
只有懒人，没有╮(╯_╰)╭丑丙。。
只有有心人，没有╮(╯_╰)╭不可能。。

微笑背后的眼泪。。

我总于鼓起勇气，跟他说分手了。
不需安慰。
不需同情。
不需问好。

我。。很好。。

我发现，分手后，生活没差。。

他的冷落，冷淡，忽冷忽热，已经让我心灰意冷了。。

我，还爱。。
他，早就不爱了。。

他给了我太多的希望。。
然而，请手毁灭一切。。

他把我抬到天堂，
然而，
把我丢进地狱。。

他对我的好，维持了很短很短的一段时间而已。。
他很轻易的把我给放弃了。。
把我们这段感情给丢了。。

为一点小事发我脾气，
我忍。。
对我忽冷忽热，
我忍。。
把所有时间给朋友，
我忍。。
对我不在乎，
我忍。。
他的坏脾气，
我忍。。

他的一切，我也包容，忍耐，迁就，让步。
但换来的，依然是他的冷漠无情。。

为了他，
把我的脾气，丢掉。。
把我的自尊，吞掉。。
把我封闭的心，打开。。

我做错什么 ？
他对我太不公平了。。

但是，分手了。。
他得来的，可能是一时的自由。。
但是，他失去一个很爱他的人。。
而我，
得来的，可能是更好的缘分。。
失去的，是个不在乎不珍惜我的人。。

我恨他，那么的坏心眼。。
把我抬高再丢我下来。。
给了我希望，还有那么多的承诺。。
我会记得他给的所有承诺，没有一个是他实现到的。。

但，爱，依然爱他。。

我整天笑嘻嘻，好想没烦恼。。
我看来不在乎，不看重感情。。

但是，

微笑背后的眼泪，
又有多少人看到。。
坚强背后的煎熬，
又有多少人知道。。

煎熬。。
很煎熬。。
跟他一起是多么煎熬。。
忍受他的一切，是多么的痛心。。

日子依然一天一天的过
地球依然会转，
日出，新的一天依然会到，
生活，依然要走下去。。

Baby, 我还爱你。。
但是， 我知道现在我的爱只是一厢情愿。。

现在，我还你自由。。
你开心了吧。。